I know there are things about myself that I need to work on, both inward and out. Manageable and realistic goals to better the person I want to become. I make lists of my weaknesses, I take note of my strengths. Then I compare both with a neutral firmness outside my own self; it’s such a fine line between bettering yourself for yourself, and bettering yourself for others. It’s so important to know the difference. Even I sometimes forget, which is why I always ask myself why I feel I need to change this part of me and how — as a whole — it will transform the person I will be tomorrow.
Allow yourself to transform as many times as you need to be fully happy and free.
This month I picked me as a boss. Now, I know what you’re thinking, “But, Airicka, you’re an author. Who are you the boss of?”
Well, let me tell you … not that many… 😬 But even an author isn’t without her team. While mine isn’t a fortune five hundred company, I do have my editor, my publicist, my personal assistant. People I depend on to guide and assist me. Okay, so it’s a community of three, but it’s not the number of people on your team, but their strengths and knowing how to properly utilize them. But we’ll save that post for another day.
What’s the point of having employees if you’re just going to do everything yourself?
During an event, a release, or just one of my self doubting moments, they stand with me, holding my hand, guiding me, and making sure I don’t trip on my virtual laces. But them being amazing isn’t the topic of this post so let’s just skip to where I had to tweak the kind of boss I was to the kind I needed to be.
Let me just quickly add here that I am a pleaser … and Canadian, so I am constantly struggling to be firm without hurting anyone’s feelings. And let me tell you, it’s a tenuous and frustrating place to be. But if being a boss was easy, anyone could do it, right? Making the tough choices is the hardest part of being the leader and making sure your directions are followed to your specifications. That’s a strange position to be in when you find yourself tiptoeing around feelings, especially if you’re like me and an absolute control freak to boot.
Example:
Me: “Okay, so for this release, we’re going to do A, B, and N, but I want to make sure you have this, this, and this handled … if you can … when you have time. No rush. I know you’re busy. You know what, why don’t I do it for you and you let me know if you like it?”
I will let them do what they’re good at while I do what I’m good at, which is writing.
That’s my job.
I’m a writer, so, I will write.
That’s my job.
I’m a writer, so, I will write.
Yeah, not very bossily. Actually, reading that, even I winced. What a control freak and maybe not very assertive. Some of you might even be thinking: typical Canadian 😒 And maybe that’s partially true. Who knows? The point is that that kind of thinking for someone who needs to be the leader, who runs a business is dangerous. What’s the point of having employees if you’re just going to do everything yourself? Mucho Loco, si? But the biggest injustice is the one you’re placing on the people you hired for their abilities. By marginalizing everything they do and shadowing their every decision is insulting to them. You made the choice to pick these people for one reason or another. You clearly saw something in what they can offer your business that you liked, so let them do their job. 
It’s not the number of people on your team, but their strengths and knowing how to properly utilize them.
So, it was time for some self reflection. It was time for one of my infamous lists. Not a pros and cons, but a list of what I needed, of the changes I needed to see, not only in myself, but my business. For 2018, I would trust my crew more. I will let them do what they’re good at while I do what I’m good at, which is writing. That’s my job. I’m a writer, so, I will write.
What about you? Are you a people pleaser, too? I’d love to hear your thoughts. Feel free to share them in the comments below. I read all of them!
But that’s it for this post. I hope to make this a weekly thing, so stay tuned for more!
